This post is a big WOW!!! by BlogAdda :)
"That's too revealing", Said he.
"Oh, Come on - You have gifted me this and you absolutely love me in this every time I have worn it - she retorted back.
"I did - but back then you were my girlfriend - today you are my wife."
She stood stunned.
Is this the same guy who had given her the freedom to be what she was ? Who just used to love and appreciate everything about her ?
Did the role of a husband made him so cold that he had started commenting on what she should wear and not wear?
5 years of an affair and blessings from their parents,they were married before an year.
But one whole year had changed a lot of things - She was a girl-friend earlier, today she is a wife. She had moulded herself into the role of wife just like water. Water has no shape - it takes the shape of the container and so is a wife - she has no identity - the wrapper of her husband and in-laws is her identity.
She used to think - Does a role change so many things - changes how a man or the society perceives a relationship ? Do men think in an orthodox manner even in this century? In a fast world - where they can have multiple girl-friends at the same time or step into extra-marital affairs in seconds and quit the love-nest anytime ?
She reached office - 'Yes, she had fought to continue working - because she wasn't among those who spend years to gain this position and quit everything in a second just because they become someone's wife'
She had overheard a conversation, where the usual guys hangout was happening - "No Yaar, She is just better of as a girl-friend,she is not marriage-material."
God damn it, What the heck was marriage-material ?
When a guy chooses or falls in for a girl - she needs to be the modern,happening types - the one whom they can flaunt before the so-called gang of theirs , She has to be intelligent and talkative with a blend of a friendly nature and a tinge of attitude and should be cheerful - fun-loving and get engaged to every activity of his.
Drinking is allowed and so is going late nights with him.
But as soon as the word "marriage" steps in - she is supposed to change her own self - the self he had fallen in love with once - her fun-loving attitude changes to a mature Wifey role - the one who "should not" be mixing with everyone else as everyone would think she does not have a character.. the one who should not be a part of all his activities - as now he needs "space" to be with his friends , the one who gives home and in-laws her priority just because she is now a wife. The one who cannot go out on night-outs just because it is not good for the daughter-in-law to move around at nights.
She is forbidden to have drinks as people would "talk" about her.
Wasn't she earlier a daughter of someone ? Din't that thought come in your mind - that I am sneaking out a girl, who is a someone's daughter - Din't at that time society come into picture? Nope, because at that time FUN was important.At that time, she was a Girl-friend.
Din't she have an identity earlier ?Din't she have her own image earlier ?
As she was going through the profiles for her brother-in-law, she overheard her mother-in-law speaking - "We want an educated girl, but we do not want her to cross the home fence".
She flung the profiles aside and a volcano burst inside and she mumbled to herself - "So, why don't you say you need an educated home maid for your son ?"
She could not raise her voice - nor she could share this because today she was a WIFE!
She was right - there are millions of hypocrites out there who would want an educated girl - a girl who had studied till her masters and had given 16 years or more of her life into books just so as to she could stand in the kitchen and cook 50 rotis a day for the family.
Apparently, they wanted a girl - whom they could show-case to the society and say - "Yes, our daughter-in-law is so intelligent - we are proud that she has completed her masters with distinction" and when the question pops up - "So,beta where do you work now ?"
There is an uncomfortable silence and happily the proud mother-in-law says - "Oh, why do we want her to work - my son is capable to feed the whole family including her..."
Was she working only because she could earn? What happened to her identity? Was she born only to be known as someone's wife?What happened to her right to have fun?
If I had the power to change something, I would tamper and re-program this attitude of believing girls as puppets and the belief that there are two types of girls - one who can be a girl-friend ONLY and the other who is a MARRIAGE-MATERIAL.
If I had the power to change something,I would change - that the world - especially the Indian society,should treat girls as human-beings and not some roles or characters or a puppet whose strings are in their hands and who can dress-up girls or women, mould them into new characters as and when they want.
A part of the world is definitely changing for our own good, Just wishing You belong to that part.
A part of the world is definitely changing for our own good, Just wishing You belong to that part.
This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda.
i loved it :)
ReplyDeleteThankies Chitra..I love what you write too :-)
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vandana
http://vanduchoudhary.blogspot.in/