Thursday, February 27, 2014

Conquering Mirrors

She glanced at him. There was a spark in him, in his innocent smile, in his eyes. 
Did she ever feel this before ? Why does he come up everyday ?

And who is that girl next to him ? Simple, calm and pure - her eyes are dark and deep. 
She walks closer and finds herself. 

What is that? She asks him - He looks at her, his lips move in and speak out "Mirror". 

A mirror ? Why do we need mirrors ? 

He comes closer, holds her hand and comes on her side. She looks over the shoulder towards him. 

Is he for real ?
Did he just hold my hand ? 

He holds the mirror upto their shoulders, so that their faces are reflected in them. 
He whispers - This is what a mirror does. It reflects us. 

Does it really ? She thought. It reflects only our outer-selves,nothing inside us.A mirror never reflects US.
Cause "US" means a really deep meaning. "US" is what is really inside me.Inside you. 

Your outer being is not what you want to see. You look into the mirror to satisfy your inner-self.
And to really satisfy your inner-self you do not need mirrors. 

You need something else - something that gives you peace from the within, something that satisfies your quest of why you really are born ? You need something that will touch your soul in a way that will lead you to supreme bliss.

Rewind - 12 years had passed and she had quit seeing mirrors. Back then, she was no where near being pretty. She did not like being like a skeleton, she hated not having long hair, she hated the obsession of being fair. 

The sheer race of being beautiful killed her. She was good at studies, more of a scholar. Intelligent, but hated to speak in public only because of the fact that people told her she was ugly. 

"Ugly", what has looks really got to do with living a happy,successful life. 

Beauty and Money is a killer combination. With people who have it and can handle it well could really live their lives with success and peace. (Oh, really!)

She had heart-breaks - heart-breaks of all sorts. Not getting that desired dress, not taking part in curricular activities,Not able to speak in public, quit going to school on a "no-uniform" day - cause everywhere there was a race of being beautiful, being rich, of being able to flaunt yourself. 

And those were one of the days, when she had heard a sentence - "you are not up-to my standards, you are not fair, you are ugly, you are nothing" 

That was the day she had stopped seeing mirrors. 

Her life went on to being successful without them. She ignored mirrors as much as everyone ignored some other blatant truths of life. 

She knew there was life beyond beauty. Beyond looking beautiful, beyond compliments. There is life beyond every single obstacle.She had hidden the fear of looking beautiful by ignoring the fact of looking at herself. 
She looked only towards her work, her family, her friends, her writings. That was were she found herself. Within her work and write-ups - she found beauty. 

And after all these years, there was someone standing right beside her showing her the biggest fear of her life. Showing her a reflection of herself, asking her to conquer the fear of not looking beautiful. Her heart ached with these thoughts. 

Conquer this fear instead of ignoring. Cause ignoring will only deepen it inside you. 

          Conquering it will make you stand up proudly, out there.
      Stand up tall, in a way, Climbing to the peak of a rough mountain.

You are beautiful. You are nothing less than anybody on this earth. You can win the world by winning this fear. You can win yourself. Cause winning yourself is more than important, than winning over anybody else.

            You can, even without me, You can do it all alone. 

She took the mirror in her hand, looked at her reflection, smiled and took his hand, forever. 
Cause there were two fears supposed to be conquered here - A conquered reflection of her, and a conquered reflection of US.

Thursday, February 20, 2014

A lil Rain, A lil Sunshine

She hit the sent button. After 30 minutes of up and down through the e-mail, after visualizing the outcomes of her new life, finally she had hit the sent button. 

Her resignation letter - It was not a surprise to anyone that day. 

"Oh, finally! there it comes" - that's what her manager told her. She tried to hide away her eyes, not wanting to show those lil waters deep inside. She had mixed feelings. She used this phrase often. But today, she exactly knew and realized these "Mixed feelings". 

"We are gonna miss you so much" - Said he. She knew it would be a matter of days when they would find a replacement and life at her workplace would be same for them. 

But for her it was an all-together new life. She was 100% sure that her ride to this new world is going to be filled with love, peace and happiness. And yet, there was this deep thing inside her - Her work, her passion, her brains, her skills, her organization, her management, her challenges - it was all gonna be replaced with something else in life. She knew it was for her better life. 

It was one more month where she was supposed to serve her due notice period.And notice periods are worse. But, in her case, she had always believed to make graceful exits. One month - you wouldn't even know and it would be over. She was doing her knowledge-transfer (whoever created that word :\) for that whole month, side-by-side doing her wedding shopping, her state was in a real dual-mode, dilemma persuaded her all those days and there it was - Her last day at work.

She had not even written her farewell letter - cause she knew no one cared to read it.Long time ago, she was the one among those - Never had time to bid farewells. 

"Let me just make it quick" and drafted a short letter - thanking and bidding everyone goodbye. It was a customary thing at the work-place. 

Her heart was heavy, but the usual bold,dynamic figure would never let the tears come out so easily - after all she was leaving for even a better reason - Her wedding, her marriage. 

She went to each one's desk to wave a good-bye and believe it or not - it was never easy to do that.

Three years - 9 or sometimes 10 hours at your work-place. 
Old friends, new friends, break-times, lunch-breaks, meetings, appraisals, promotions,presentations,appreciations - every single thing takes you to a flash-back of golden memories. 

She reached home and there was no-one.Everyone was at a party. She could hear the pangs of her heart.Her most desired passion just came to an end. She would never be able to work at the same place, the same position, the same identity. 

Her heart traveled to the day she had received her promotion.That was the best day of her life. 
She could hear the personalized ring-tone on her cell.

It was him. He knows me so well, he knows exactly when to call - thought she. She picked it up and burst out crying with his first question - Are you ok, baby? 

No she was not. She had given her most prized possession, her work, her career and it was completely her choice to do it. 

There he was miles away from her, known her for only two months and he knew exactly what she was feeling. 

Her heart regained the usual position with his one question - Do you trust me ? 

And she exactly knew what life had it in for her. She was going to be with someone who loved her for what she was.She was going to be someone for the rest of her life who could read her heart and mind. She was going to be with someone who would never let her mood go down. She was going to be with someone who could sing and dance for her. She was going to be someone who appreciated her imperfection. With all her flaws and drawbacks, she had proudly accepted him to be her husband - the guy who was so perfect for her. His voice could turn the world for her.

Two months of talks had changed her to something she knew which never existed in her. She had a new identity of her own. Till yesterday, she was known for the passion of her work and today she is known for the way she loves him deeply. 

Today she is engraved with his flavors of love, his colors of love - that big rainbow in her life that just occurred with a lil rain and a lil sun-shine.